»  Radio Derb — Transcript

        Friday, July 25, 2008

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[Music clip: Haydn's Derbyshire Marches.]

01 — Intro.     I had better warn you, gentle listener, that Radio Derb will be in angry mode this week. I'm in a bit of a lather. Sometimes the insanity in the world, the sheer mass of unreason, overwhelms and unhinges me. It's a thing that happens once in a while, and I just have to get it out of my system. Next week, I assure you, I shall be back to my genial, forbearing, diffident self, with charity towards all and malice towards none. This week, however, I'm going to let rip, so you might want to turn down the volume on your iPod a bit. Are you ready? Into the maelstrom!

02 — Bologna killings in SF 1: Illegal perp.     Outrage of the week. The actual outrage occurred last month, June 22, in San Francisco. This week we got all the details, following a court arraignment in that city. What had happened on June 22 was the murder of Tony Bologna and his two sons by a creature who, one is surprised to find, has a name, just as if he were a human being. The name is Edwin Ramos. Tony Bologna was 48 years old, an honest hard-working taxpaying citizen and a good family man. His sons Michael and Matthew were 20 and 16 years old respecitvely, fine-looking young American men. The three Bolognas were shot to death in their car by the Ramos thing when they got in his way while he was trying to make a left turn. Ramos is a citizen of El Salvador, living in this country illegally. He is a member of the MS-13 criminal gang, which has also become active here on Long Island since the benefits of illegal immigration were showered down on us. Ramos, who is 21, had previously been arrested at least three times. Two of those were felony arrests at age 17: one for the gang-related assault of a passenger on public transportation, the other for the attempted robbery of a pregnant woman. Neither of these felony arrests led to the Ramos object being surrendered by San Francisco juvenile justice authorities to federal immigration officials for possible deportation. Why not? Because San Francisco, in defiance of federal law, is a sanctuary city, that aids and protects illegal immigration. In fact, neither of those felony arrests seem to have led to Ramos doing much jail time. If you or I, Joe or Sally middle-class citizen, give the finger to the IRS, we get hustled off to do five years of porridge in the federal pen. Illegal immigrants get a pass though, being a protected class and all. If you hike up from El Salvador or Mexico to commit your crime — say, rob a pregnant woman at knife point — well, nothing much will happen to you. It's not really a crime at all, just an understandable reaction to the oppression and racism of American society. Who could blame you? As for deportation — good grief, no! What do you think this is, Nazi Germany? And so we get crimes like the Bologna killings. One of the most heartbreaking things I have seen for a long time was a clip of the distraught Danielle Bologna being interviewed by Megyn Kelly on Fox News. What that poor woman must be going through, beggars the imagination. She had a loving husband and two fine sons; now she has nothing. Nothing can assuage her grief; nothing can compensate her for what she has lost. I none the less hope the following. I hope the traitors and fools who allowed the Edwin Ramos rodent to be at large in this country can be identified. I hope some ingenious lawyer finds a way to sue them, and their municipal and/or federal employers and enablers. I hope the lawsuit is successful, and poor Mrs. Bologna collects big. Personally, if I were the judge, and the city of San Francisco were the defendant, I'd award Mrs Bologna enough so that the damn fool citizens of San Francisco, who elected the damn fool liars and thieves they call a municipal government, are paying for their precious "sanctuary city" idiocy till their damn fool noses bleed. Given the size and wealth of San Francisco, I think a hundred billion would be a fair settlement. At any rate, and with all proper respect to her incalculable grief, Mrs. Bologna should at the very least never again have to think about money.

03 — Bologna killings in SF 2: D.A. loves illegals.     All right, calm down, Derb — take a deep cleansing breath. Right. OK. What else we got. No, sorry, not ready to let that one go yet. There are too many sidebar issues. For one, there is the issue of justice. The District Attorney in San Francisco is a lady named Kamala Harris. It says on her website that she is, quote: "A veteran prosecutor who has dedicated her outstanding legal talents to prosecuting violent crime, combating the sexual exploitation of children, fighting elder abuse and working creatively to improve the quality of life in San Francisco." End quote. I guess "creatively" is accurate. Ms. Harris did not devote any of her outstanding creative talents to ridding San Francisco of vermin like Edwin Ramos, though it would have been very easy to do so, since his very presence in the city was a result of his having violated federal law. Apparently ridding her city of obvious menaces like Ramos is not any part of, quote, "improving the quality of life in San Francisco." Ms. Harris also campaigned for election in 2003 as a strong opponent of the death penalty, so don't be looking for the Edwin Ramos creature to face the just punishment for what he did. Probability is, he'll get 25 years if convicted, do twelve, then be out on parole to party with his MS-13 gang buddies. Mr. Bologna and his two sons will still be dead at that point, and Mrs. Bologna will still be grieving their loss: but hey, who cares about them? They are just American citizens — you know, the oppressors of the world, reactionary white racist shlubs who shop at K-Mart, put crucifixes on their walls, and drive cars that Al Gore disapproves of. Suckers, in short: no-account, low-class white people who never even went to law school, and are really good for nothing much but paying taxes and showing up as election fodder for our two big political parties, both of them committed to multiculturalism, open borders, amnesty, and sanctuary cities. Why would any politician care about people like that?

04 — Bologna killings in SF 3: Gavin Newsom's priorities.     And then there is Gavin Newsom, the exceptionally well-dressed mayor of San Francisco. What does Mayor Newsom care about? Go to his website and take a look. Quotes from that website, quote: "the nation's largest municipal solar incentive program legislation." Quote: "Wind Power." Quote: "New Funding to House Homeless Veterans." Quote: "San Francisco a Step Ahead as Most 'Walkable' U.S. City." Quote: "Mayor Newsom Issues Request for Information for Innovative Projects to Make San Francisco EV-Ready." What's that? EV? Is that anything like ED? No: EV means "electric vehicle." See, next time an illegal immigrant gang banger leans out of the window of his car and wipes out your menfolk with a spray of AK-47 fire, that car will be electric-powered! And of course there is Mayor Newsom's signature project: gay marriage. What could be more important than that? You may be interested to know that Mayor Newsom is setting up to run for Governor of California in 2010. He already has a campaign website online. As governor perhaps he'll make California the first sanctuary state — wouldn't that be exciting?

05 — Dreaming of justice.     I have a dream, ladies and gentleman. I have a dream that one day, the citizens of this country will elect leaders who give a flying damn about the citizens of this country. I have a dream that one day we will elect politicians — mayors, governors, presidents, congressmen, senators — who give a damn about us, the citizens of the United States, and who care not a jot about Salvadorans, Mexicans, Iraqis, Israelis, or Afghans, except in so far as their actions impinge on our interests. I have a dream. I have a dream that my two little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the misfortune of having been born American, with a load of historical guilt dragging them down from one side, and a load of obligations to the other six billion people of the world dragging them down from the other side: a nation where they will be proud to be American, proud in the nation they belong to, and not at all inclined to vote for politicians who sacrifice their money, their environment, their jobs, even their lives, to the advantage of foreign trespassers on American soil, or to political factions in foreign countries who've conned us into eliminating their political enemies for them. I have a dream that one day we will have state and federal governments who ask of any policy: "Is this good for Americans?" And who, if the answer is "no," will reject that policy without further ado, to concentrate their efforts on improving the security and prosperity of Americans — American citizens, American voters.

06 — Afghanistan drives me nuts.     All right: I think I've got it off my chest. Some things just make me so mad. Off on a tangent, now, let me ask you this, gentle listeners: Can anyone please tell me what the heck we are doing in Afghanistan? Or what we hope to do? Anyone? We went in there seven years ago — seven years! — to punish the Taliban government for hosting Osama bin Laden and his gang of crazies. OK, the Taliban was overthrown. And then the next seven years — what? What? What have we done? What have we tried to do? This is just as baffling to me as Iraq, only two years more so. Whatever happened to gunboat diplomacy? Some primitive country vexes you. You send an expeditionary force, break their stuff, kill their leaders, shell the palace, blow up the arsenal, mine the harbor. Make your point. Then go home. You made your point; they got your point. Or if they didn't, go back and do it again, with twice the ordnance. Sooner or later, it'll sink in. None of this takes seven years and a trillion dollars. Seven weeks generally does the trick. So what are we doing in Afghanistan? Trying to give them a stable, Anglo-Saxon style of government and constitution? [Laughter] Are we nuts? We spend billions of dollars, and untold numbers of lives, patrolling the borders of godforsaken sink-holes like Afghanistan and Iraq, while psychopaths like Edwin Ramos violate our own borders undisturbed? Either this country has gone mad, or I have. I guess it must be me, since the process of open democracy has brought forward two presidential candidates who (a) want to keep our armies in Afghanistan and Iraq until the crack of doom, and (b) open our borders even further to foreign hooligans. Yep, must be me. Better look up a shrink in the Yellow Pages before I harm somebody.

07 — Iraq prez on our election.     The Iranian-backed stooge — oops, sorry, I mean His Excellency the President of Iraq — poked his head out from his bunker in the U.S. protected Green Zone for a few seconds the other day to tell us that Barack Obama is a jolly fine fellow and the government of Iraq is fully on board with whatever President — that is, presumptive presidential nominee — Obama wants. Likewise, by the way, with the other presumptive nominee, Senator What's-his-name, the cranky old guy who can't get any TV time. Yep, whatever these guys want is fine with Maliki. Except that, you know, Iraq is, like, a proudly independent country that won't be bossed about by any Yankee imperialists. No way! They just need a little more help to get on their feet. Just a billion here, a billion there, that'll do the trick. Oh, and, yeah, Maliki thanks us a bunch for killing or taming all his political enemies. That's helped him no end! He's much more secure now, and so are his pals in Tehran. In fact, Iraqis can finish off the job themselves now, pretty much, if we wouldn't mind just handing over another, oh, could we make it five billion? That'll be great. Just leave the check under the pillow, thanks. Has anyone looked up the Corruption index on the Transparency International database lately? I just did. 179 countries listed, from least corrupt at number one — that would be Denmark, Finland, and New Zealand tied — to most corrupt at number 179, Somalia. Iraq … let me see … yep, holding steady at 178. Afghanistan? Just a tad behind at 172. Could there be any countries more worth fighting for than these? Of course there couldn't. Our brave Iraqi and Afghani friends, struggling to build democracy! Lest anyone should think I'm cynical — I couldn't bear for anyone to think that! — I'll play this segment out with the Iraqi national anthem. [Ker-ching, ker-ching, …]

08 — Obama in Berlin.     Was there ever such a bag of wind as Barack Obama? Did you make it all the way through his Berlin speech before the clouds of hot gas sent you off to chase the dragon? The trick with a speech like that is to sift through it looking for the small number of actual declarative statements. When you find one, check it against reality. Chances are, it's plain false. Example: Wonder Boy says that, quote: "Not only have walls come down in Berlin, but they have come down in Belfast, where Protestant and Catholic found a way to live together." End quote. Only problem with that is, it's not true. Last time I checked, the walls in Belfast were still in place — the one between the Loyalist Shankill Road district and the Republican Falls Road, for example. Last I heard, in fact, the Belfast city fathers were commissioning artists to paint murals on the walls, to brighten them up a bit. So far as their actual purpose is concerned — that purpose being, to keep loyalists and republicans from cutting each others' throats — the walls work fine. Loyalists and republicans in Belfast — or "Protestants" and "Catholics" to Senator Obama, who could not locate Belfast on a map to the nearest continent — have not found a way to live together, they've found a way to live apart, which is a much more satisfactory state of affairs. Multiculturalism and "diversity," which are Obama's touchstones, which are the very air he breathes — and which also, and by no means irrelevantly, are his wife's source of income, to the tune of $300,000 a year — are a total bust everywhere: in Belfast, the Balkans, Iraq, France, Kenya, Lebanon, Bolivia, Sudan, Tibet, everywhere. The age of easy mixing, of tolerating each other and getting along together — that age is over. This is the age of ethnic solidarity and separation, an age when people want walls built, not pulled down. If Obama doesn't understand that, he's a bigger fool than he looks. Which is hard to believe.

09 — Obama's plan for corvée labor.     Although sometimes I wonder. Take Senator Obama's plan for what he calls "service." This was outlined in a speech the Senator gave in Colorado Springs, July 2nd. Sample, long quote: "When I'm President, I will set a goal for all American middle and high school students to perform 50 hours of service a year, and for all college students to perform 100 hours of service a year. This means that by the time you graduate college, you'll have done 17 weeks of service. We'll reach this goal in several ways. At the middle and high school level, we'll make federal assistance conditional on school districts developing service programs, and give schools resources to offer new service opportunities. At the community level, we'll develop public-private partnerships so students can serve more outside the classroom." End long quote. You're going to be hearing a whole lot more about "service" this campaign. It's a code word, of course, but what's it a code word for? Well, leftists live in a continuous state of disappointment at ordinary people, who just aren't as virtuous as leftists want them to be, or as leftists themselves are. Well, if people won't be virtuous of their own accord, the government must make them virtuous. That's what "service" is all about. Another way to translate "service" is with the good old feudal term "corvée labor." See, the whole point of virtuous behavior is, it should expect no reward. Virtue is its own reward, didn't your mother tell you that? So this virtuous behavior that the government is going to force you to engage in, won't be paid. Just wanted to get that clear. But … what will all this "service" actually consist of? Will these schoolkids be, like, sweeping the streets clean of litter? Has Obama squared this with municipal employee unions? Or are they going to be taking hot meals to old folks? There are 1500 kids just in my local high school, and nothing like that number of old people who would welcome teenagers coming into their houses with ill-cooked meals. Fact, most of the old people I know would barricade their doors and load a shotgun if they saw a bunch of teenagers with baggy pants and nose rings coming up the path. So … what will all this compulsory labor, this corvée labor, what will it actually consist of? Of course, Obama hasn't a clue. He's just puffing out gusts of hot gas. People would abandon the public schools in droves if this scheme of compulsory unpaid teenage labor ever came to fruition.

10 — Obama hates ICE.     From that same speech, here's what Wonder Boy had to say about immigration law enforcement, and about ICE — the Immigration and Customs Enforcement agency — quote: "When communities are terrorized by ICE immigration raids, when nursing mothers are torn from their babies, when children come home from school to find their parents missing, when people are detained without access to legal counsel, when all that is happening, the system just isn't working, and we need to change it." End quote. Heaven forbid Senator Obama should give any support to the overworked, underpaid federal employees of ICE who are tasked with enforcing the people's laws on immigration. Why, it is cruel and inhuman to enforce those laws! Our federal agents are beasts and torturers, hardly any better than our soldiers in Iraq, ripping nursing babies from their mother's breast, throwing people into dungeons without access to lawyers! The enemy, the hateful, terrifying enemy, is not people who flout our nation's laws for money, it is the jackbooted thugs of federal law enforcement who try to arrest them! And federal law enforcement officers report to whom? Why, to the President of the United States! Well, you can be sure that with Barack Obama in the White House, there will be no more of this hateful law enforcement business. ICE will probably be disbanded, the people who staff it sent off to re-education camps in the Aleutian Islands to learn Spanish and get some proper diversity training under their belt. Perhaps Mrs. Obama will condescend to fly over to give them a couple of lectures. Wouldn't that be a treat! The slogan for an Obama presidency will apparently be: "Down with federal law enforcement!"

11 — Obama wants to double the FBI.     I can't let Obama's Colorado Springs speech go without one more quote, this one truly breathtaking. Quote: "We cannot continue to rely on our military in order to achieve the national security objectives we've set. We've got to have a civilian national security force that's just as powerful, just as strong, just as well-funded." End quote. O-K, let's see: the last year for which I have Department of Defense figures is 2007, for which budgeted military expenditure was a tad over $439 billion. So Obama says — he actually did say, in Colorado Springs on July 2nd, there are video clips of his speech all over the web — he says that he wants to add an equal amount, another $439 billion dollars, to the federal budget for a quote "civilian national security force." Well, a civilian security force means a police force. What else does it mean? I assume words will still have dictionary meanings under an Obama administration. He can't repeal the meaning of words, can he? A national civilian security force means a national police force, presumably an arm of the FBI, which is our current national police force. All right, let's crunch the numbers. What's the annual budget of the FBI? The latest year I have a figure for is 2006, when it was $8.7 billion. Wonder Boy wants to jack that up to $439 billion, he says. That's what the man said, in plain words. To put it another way, he wants the FBI to be fifty times bigger than it currently is. Fifty times bigger! So all the FBI agents we currently have, nationwide, could be assigned to one state! What are they all going to do? Arrest illegal immigrants? Good grief no! — that would be wrong. Or perhaps Obama's idea is that this 50-fold FBI will be staffed by all those middle- and high-school kids doing their compulsory unpaid "service." Now there's something to look forward to: Acne-scarred 14-year-olds with nose rings, braces, backward baseball caps, iPods, and baggy pants, doing law enforcement on the streets of your town. Don't you feel safer already?

12 — Endless charity.     I'm sorry to be working over Barack Obama so much, it's irresistible. There's just too much low-hanging fruit here. Go back to the Berlin speech again, for instance. Quote: "Will we extend our hand to the people in the forgotten corners of this world who yearn for lives marked by dignity and opportunity; by security and justice? Will we lift the child in Bangladesh from poverty, shelter the refugee in Chad, and banish the scourge of AIDS in our time? Will we stand for the human rights of the dissident in Burma, the blogger in Iran, or the voter in Zimbabwe? Will we give meaning to the words 'never again' in Darfur?" End quote. To borrow the punchline of a well-known joke: Whaddya mean, we? We, individual citizens, with consciences, and religious or charitable obligations, and spare cash or time to fulfil them? I'm all for it. Let's each of us do what he can to improve the world, if we feel the urge to do so. But that, of course, is not what Senator Obama means. What he means is: We, the federal government, spending our people's money for these wonderful purposes — money dragged from the pockets of working Americans under force of law. Morally speaking, that's an utterly different ball game. I might believe, as a Christian or a Jew or a secular humanitarian, that it's my moral duty to help the refugee in Chad, wherever the heck that is. Then I ought to get my checkbook out, or block out a few evenings of my time. My elected government, though, should attend to the problems of Chadian refugees if it is in our national interest to do so, and for no other reason at all, ever.

13 — McCain says nothing.     All right, enough with this politics. Oh, I suppose I should say something about the other guy, the bald one with the creepy smile. Right. What's he been up to? Well, Senator McCain went somewhere and made a speech about something. Nobody knows what he said because nobody showed up to report it. Then he went somewhere else, where nobody showed up to ask him why he didn't take some shots at the big fat targets Obama is putting up for him, so that Senator McCain didn't have to reply: "That wouldn't be honorable. Besides the media would call me a racist." Which of course they would. Then McCain went and said something or other to an empty hall somewhere else, where nobody asked him why he keeps former Mexican cabinet official and Vicente Fox crony Juan Hernandez in a leading position on his campaign team, so that the Senator did not have to denounce the questioner as a vile hateful nativist racist bigot. Then McCain went somewhere else and gave a speech about something else … but who cares?

14 — Subway imam.     Really enough with politics now. What else is there? Well, there's religion. We've been having a fuss here in New York over ads on the subway system. The ads are for a religion. Can you guess which one? Right. The subway ads are being paid for by the Islamic Circle of North America, which describes itself on its website as, quote, "a leader in pioneering up to date strategies to better convey the true understanding of Islam to others and clarify many of the misconceptions of Islam." You know where we are here, don't you? This is the "religion of peace" subway stop. Please don't block the closing doors or we'll have to hack off your head and post the clip on YouTube. As a matter of fact, the leader of this group is a pious chap named Siraj Wahhaj, who is the imam of a mosque in Brooklyn. Mr. Wahhaj has a bit of a track record, if you'll pardon the expression. He was a character witness for Sheikh Omar Abdel-Rahman, convicted mastermind of the 1993 World Trade Center bombing. He also appeared on a list of 170 potential unindicted co-conspirators in that 1993 bombing case. Mr. Wahhaj is on record as having said, quote: "the FBI and the CIA are the real terrorists." His dream, also on record, is that all Americans will be, quote, "persuaded" to become Muslims. If the persuasion doesn't work, of course, other methods will have to be tried. What does our Mayor have to say about these subway ads promoting Islam? Quote from Michael Bloomberg: "If you were to advocate becoming a Muslim, I assume the First Amendment would protect you." End quote. If, on the other hand, you were to advocate smoking cigarettes via ads on Mayor Bloomberg's subway trains, or cooking with trans fats, the First Amendment would not protect you. Ads like that would be ripped from the trains by the Mayor with his own bare hands. Jihad — yes; Marlboros — no. That's America's scale of values today. [Subway sound] Allah aboard!

15 — Signoff.     There, I feel much better now. If you thought you detected construction noises in the background of this week's broadcast, I apologize. We are adding another five floors to the top of Buckley Towers to accommodate Jonah's people, whose pleas about the indignity of having to camp out in Central Park finally got through to the suits. They've thrown me a bone too — a fine new recording studio, much bigger than our current niggardly fifteen hundred square feet, with state of the art equipment and a bunch of new hires to operate it all. So look for dramatic improvements in the quality of Radio Derb real soon. In the meantime, nil desperandum, cultivate your private life while you're still permitted to have one, and remember that Ron Paul still walks among us. Onward and upward!

[Music clip: More Haydn.]